| "re you financially qualified to achieve your goal of buying a first home, yet you postpone the project year after year?" "Perhaps you believe laziness has kept you from meeting the home-buying challenge. But procrastination experts say it is much more likely that hidden mental blocks are to blame. One common emotional barrier is perfectionism, says Lenora M. Yuen, co-author of "Procrastination: Why You Do It, What to Do About It."" "Yuen, a psychologist in Palo Alto, Calif., tells how a former client with a successful career in the field of technology sales had failed to achieve his home-buying goal for six years before turning to her for help." "In therapy, the client realized he had been searching in vain for a flawless house to buy. Why had he set a perfectionist's standard? He discovered that he had mentally equated his self-worth to the quality of his home." "Once the client realized that perfectionism had undermined his plans, he could relax and consider houses on a more realistic basis, without feeling that his self-esteem was on the line." ""He gave up his picture of the ideal house that would impress the world. Instead, he focused on finding a place with a good view and a layout comfortable for him," Yuen remembers." "Besides perfectionism, other emotional factors can cause prospective home buyers to postpone a purchase, says Joan Minninger, a San Francisco psychotherapist and author of such books as "Make Your Mind Work for You: New Mind Power Techniques to Improve Memory, Beat Procrastination and More!"" "Minninger, in private practice for 26 years, says she has worked with a number of female clients who have long postponed their home-buying plans due to a hidden fear that owning their own place would reduce their chances to marry and have children." "Such clients — typically professional women ages 36 to 46 — view home-buying as a romantic, nesting activity, rather than a financial step, Minninger says." "She also has had clients who came to realize that upsetting childhood experiences have unknowingly caused them to postpone a property purchase. For instance, perhaps they had lived through a bank foreclosure on their parents' home." "Here are suggestions ... read the whole article |