10 ways to garden with your partner and stay together
1. Eliminate the competition.
The most important thing is to avoid getting your partner interested in gardening in the first place. Then you get complete control over the garden.
2. Divide and conquer.
If your partner is keen on gardening, divide the garden down the middle. Better yet, try to interest your partner in mowing, weeding and general maintenance. That will free up your time for the really fun stuff.
3. Hoard the good stuff.
Spend at least a quarter of your free time going to nurseries. This will allow you to find those rare and attractive plants that will make your side of the garden look better than your partner's. Don't even hope to have any money saved to see you through your golden years.
4. Avoid the cutting edge.
Hide pruning shears from your partner until he or she promises not to turn any more plants into balls and doughnuts.